The day started really badly as one of the main problems acted up. Somehow with self-talk and questions I managed to stop myself from falling into darkness. It almost felt like I made a choice. I can't remember ever succeeding on this level like today. Maybe even in this area practice makes perfect. Felt like this momentum even helped to manage obsessions. I just kept sprinting with work occupying my thoughts. Actively using my will of course. Did quite a good job at work too.
Psychiatrist tomorrow. Planning to bring up my gender dysphoria and it's a very high probability that she will put this on some mental disorder. Well to be honest I'm not 100% sure it isn't...
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