Monday

It's weird but it was an okay day. Of course it started yesterday when I managed not only to avoid complete darkness but also did a good amount of work which I didn't expect. That was a sort of achievement that put me in a slightly positive state. Also hyped myself for Monday. I made myself view this not only as a waste of time and pain day but as a stepping stone in my journey/plan. Even though during the day there were negative moments for sure but it was easier to get out of it without spending too much time. Such [rare] days make me think what if I could live without drugs. But then again mood swings are so wild that one moment I could be smiling and laughing and another moment I could be preparing a rope to hang myself with. Well Im joking here. But just slightly though.

Currently my biggest fear is that I won't be able to fix my hair. Even though there is a good chance I will fix it, the chance of not being able to is killing me on daily basis.